Success? 1099K's completed.

That's right. almost 1100k cycled run or walked, in total by the combined efforts of 70 people,mostly recovering people and some members of the public in the Haringey/Hackney/Islington areas, and almost £500 raised. The most noticeable feature though was the vibe of togetherness of the public and people in recovery. Total strangers were willing to help us, and work with their own children in tow to increase our achievement. Some noticeable feats of endurance and pushing back personal boundaries were achieved, most notably 2 people who had not cycled more than 10 miles previously who both exceeded 35 miles. The course was hilly and not easy to cycle. A number of children including the local youth joined us. Next we will attempt to bring more areas of east london on board.

1000K in a day build up

I've been concentrating all my efforts on a 1000K combined cycle relay in Finsbury Park North London. It is happening, this Saturday 27th September. Logistics have been a nightmare, and my ultrarunning exploits have had to take a back seat, but thats a positive because we now number 10-20 hardcore recovering people who have taken endurance sports on as a way of expressing ourselves and being of service to others. It's a fundraiser, all proceeds go to providing more sports and outdoor pursuits for people with addiction issues in our borough of North London.

About 2 months ago we were awarded £5000 by the London Cycling Campaign, and since then we haven't looked back, organising this event as a way of publicising our philosophy of phsysical lifestyle as a way of focusing your life post drugs/alcohol.

All the local cycle shops have sponsored us, the supermarkets and cafes have helped us out with food, and the local press and drug/alcohol therapy trade press will be in attendance.

We've been training hard in the parks and along the canals of North & East London, along the Thames, through the City & West End. if we raise enough money we'll go out to the Chilterns this Autumn for some serious mountain biking (and trail running). See the Wheels of Recovery blog in the links.

South Downs Way - 30 miles - Hottest day of the year.

Stupid idea really but I'd signed up for the Downland Challenge Race so it seemed a shame to miss it despite forecasts of 30 degrees heat. I panicked and bought a camel back which holds a litre and a half, and drank incessantly which gave me stitches that were so bad I found it difficult to breathe. By the last 5-6 miles virtually everyone was walking.

Basically I went with an agenda. I then paid the price for that. Secretly in the back of my mind I was hatching plans of faster times in direct contradiction of my philosophy which is to stay at the back and run as you feel, getting faster over the miles if the body allows it. This time I tore off in the first thirty and spent the whole day being passed by a various assortment of people aged generally between 50 and 70. It was generally an unpleasant and disheartening experience - OR WAS IT.....

Thinking to myself later as I recovered on Brighton Beach in the evening glow, recovering more from a near drowning experience than from the run (I'm not joking - the tide turned when I was still out) I realised that this was a terrific learning for me. Go back to the enjoyment. What am I seeking. I won't find it because I already have it. The enjoyment and meditative aspect is in the distance not the time. Later that week I made the decision to focus my training for the autumn on a community endurance event and getting some of the less experienced guys to do some mileage, and thus experience the buzz free from addiction. If this means cancelling the last two dates of my Vasque Championship placement attempt then that's OK. I can always do it next year. Take it easy.

PS note picture of Hampstead Heath (not unlike the South Downs!)

Cadair Berwyn & Cadair Bromwen (Wales)

This is where I stay in the Berwyn Mountains when I need head clearance. It is a no alcohol or drugs zone plus there are no showers so you don't get much company apart from the odd smelly shaman! Cadair just means chair, and Berwyn and Bromwen are indigenous God and Goddess respectively.The waterfalls are reputed to have been of significance to the druids and the pools are just about the only place to wash.

After this latest experience which just about finished off my knees, I've become convinced that this blog should be more of an ode to outdoors living and insights gained in that space, rather than account after account of mileage and more neurotic accomplishments. I've run Cadair Berwyn before but this time I went over the top and on over his sister peak Bromwen, and then on towards Moel Fferna. At 18 odd miles this was one of the toughest runs I've ever done. The next day out and about walking I enjoyed myself much more to be honest, when i could take the time to watch things.

I've never seen anyone else fell running on Berwyn, which is not suprising because the terrain is uniquely horrendous and this mountain range (just inland from Snowdonia) seems to have a particularly vicious weather system all of its own, even in summer. The mountain sides are full of trails but these give way once you summit, where it is boggy, craggy and extremely windswept. You can see the twin chairs of Berwyn and Bromwen in the photo. I love running along that windswept ridge looking down on red kites and other large birds. It makes you dizzy following their flight on a background of green rather than sky. Descending back to the Rhaeadr

Falls I iced my legs in a mountain pool, and then dried off on a sunny slab of granite.

Marlborough Challenge. 33 miles

I did a 33 mile hillrace I did on Saturday morning. Nothing compares with that insidious, creeping agony which takes over the body in extra-long distance runs, particularly the joint rattling multi terrain jobs. I am hugely respectful of these individuals I meet, many of them women, who do what I know many people could not do even after years of training. The pain is particularly difficult to live with because it just goes on and on.

I came 30th out of 121 and I swear I wasn't expecting to be in the top 50%. If you're in recovery take note because 12 months ago I was chuffing 20 a day, and now I'm taking part in the Vasque Ultra-Running Championships (if only in an amateurish capacity). Until 7 years ago I was abusing myself daily with class A drugs. When you do that for 15 years it really does put you at a disadvantage to people who never even smoked but therein lies the answer. From the start I just relaxed and let everyone pass me, I had no expectations whatsoever. Then I just spent the day catching people up in true Tortoise fashion. I'm not saying that I've never tried to be the Hare, I'm just immensley glad that I can enjoy the ride now.

Wansdyke 28 miles

This one took me through some deep country. I didn't notice it at the time but looking back the Wansdyke was fantastic. It is an ancient fortification which was built by the Saxon kings to protect the northern borders of Wessex. At points you can see 10-20 miles on both sides. It is high up on the Marlborough downs which are a peculiar ridge of high ground in Wiltshire. I stopped to eat something next to some derelict barns and noticed that I could hear insects buzzing. That's when I realized that the nearest roads were out of earshot and out of sight. Southern England doesn't have many areas that are this quiet. At the end of the run, I discovered that one of my toes had peeled down to the flesh.



The next day I met some really interesting people who help to treat people in addiction using Tai Chi and martial arts, even some of the hard stuff like Tae Kwondo. It was such an excellent feeling to meet people who share my outdoors philosophy of physical therapy. life seems to be throwing these like-minded individuals my way at the moment, and a plan is now afoot for a group of recovering people to make a pilgrimage by bike or foot from one major city to another, off road, using only the ancient trails.

White Horse Hill - 20 miles

This is Whitehorse Hill (Wiltshire) in the distance. It was an iron age hill fort for the Celts and has a 400ft. wide white horse carved on the hillside. The road you see is the Ridgeway, a 5000 year old road that cuts through the heart of southern England. I am about to run up it on a very cold but sunny Winters day. The Horse itself is a genuine bronze age chalk engraving widely associated with the Celtic Goddess Epona (but that's probably a load of bol***ks). You can't really see it from the ground. No one knows why they drew it but I guess the celts loved horses, and the area is still a big horse trading area because of the soft ground for training.There are many ancient burial sites here like Wayland Smithy, connected with the Saxon God of Blacksmiths, Weland, who purportedly forged Beowulfs chainmail shirt.This whole area vibrates with the memory of the indigenous people of Britain which is why I enjoy running here. It once would've been border country between the Saxon Kings of Wessex (fighting to defend England) and the Northern Danelaw or "Vikings" who have now thankfully been beaten back to their strongholds in places like Newcastle.I really feel like I'm connecting with something when I'm here. This doesn't tend to happen on short runs, you have to go further. The exhaustion of the long runs makes the experience stick in your mind for months, and the wild countryside seems to seep into you when you're alone on these trails.

The whole day really lifted me after what has been a difficult winter. In all the 20 miles took about 5 hours , mainly because I kept stopping and perpetrating unspeakable acts. I would definitely like to run the whole of the Ridegway this Spring. It's 87 miles in total and such a great route, entirely cross country.

Barbury Castle to somewhere & back. 17 miles. 3 hours

This was my fifth run out on the Ridgeway this winter. I usually do between 13 & 20 miles. Hilariously bad map reading saw me running parallell to my intended route for almost the entire journey. I immediately missed the sign for the Ridgeway having of course done my customary night of no sleep. I proceeded down a track which is specifically designed to break in the worlds hardest tanks. All the time I could see the Ridgeway up on -the Ridge (what on earth was it doing up there?!). This was accompanied by expletives and an extreme inability to forgive myself (alcoholics speciality).
I rejoined the Ridgeway only to lose it again almost immediately. I completed the remainder of my outward journey through a grotty myre of sludge in a misty valley bottom. After surrendering to my loss I found myself suddenly and inexplicably on the correct path. Back up on the windswept ridge the downland opened up. Marlborough is a beautiful area marred only by its population, who have horses instead of legs, and who appear to have had their tongues removed.
I hit the wall bang on 15 miles again. I can't describe the perverted enjoyment of running in agony to non-runners. It's a bit like loving tight shoes for the thrill of taking them off. The pleasure comes from literally feeling the fat burning off and then stopping & consuming a village sized choclate bar.
I felt redeemed-I hadn't given up, merely missed my mark. The original definition of sin, in archery terminology, is to shoot wide (note to all recovering people). My original intentions had yet again been laughably derailed. I learnt things though - use a compass, read the map, pay attention, assume responsibilty.
I stopped in Avebury on the way back where, upon finding myself pennyless and light headed I actually jumped the counter of the local post office and performed a vicious sugar raid. Then again in the next village, and the next... Ten minutes from my destination on the edge of Bristol I actually had to stop and sleep for 2 hours in the layby because I was blacking out at the wheel.

Clifton suspension bridge to Severn River suspension bridge & back - 28 miles

My first trail marathon was completely made up by myself and consisted of one athlete (myself). I named it The Great Lawrence Weston Council Estate Marathon, in honour the housing estate through which it passed, although the majority of it meandered along the River avon - Bristol. It was a completely spontanoeous act born out of sheer fury one cold and sleepless morning during Christmas 2007. I admit I have occassional sleeping problems since shelving the chemical sledgehammer as a nightcap option. I have found that ovaltine does not work - extreme physical exhaustion sometimes does. The furthest I had ever run previously was 17 miles around Hampstead Heath, a feat which left me shivering from only the waist down, a most disconcerting effect which I dubbed "cold legs", only later did I discover that this is what they meant by "hitting the wall".

I got up at 6am disgusted through lack of sleep and deliberately ran along the river Avon downstream for 14 miles knowing that I would then be forced to return and thus complete 28 miles, smashing the impregnable barrier of the 26.2 mile marathon in my mind. Whether this was an act of penance, self-flagellation or more akin to actual self -harm is still beyond me but I do know that it had a powerful cathartic effect. I did it in 4 hours 10 mins. which was not bad although clearly I am not going to become a world leader in this sport.

It was a curious trail, very urban and beat up, and like me it wandered on a dejected odyssey through industrial zones and housing estates, which were particularly uninspiring when viewed through the watery peel of sleeplessness.

The Healing Power of the Trail

This blog is about my lone trail running adventures across Britain. I am seven years into a drug and alcohol free lifestyle and I find running into these empty places helps me a lot. My mind gets focused in a way that I've always found difficult to achieve with eastern meditation and stuff like that. Horses for courses I guess.I've always had a lot of energy which has got me into trouble at times, both whilst drinking and since becoming sober. Traditional competitive sports and martial arts were a bit dodgy for me because advesarial encounters tended to make me negative, so I struck on this as a really positive and peaceful way to channel my energy.Whilst running on trails you get to be alone in nature, often surrounded by spectres of our ancient past. Self reliance is developed and yet the smallness of individuality is also shockingly realised during extreme fatigue, hunger, loneliness, and the possibility of getting lost in the hills (all features of trail running). This can lead to a "handing over " or even the total destruction of more egotistical goals such as winning, as you struggle to just finish the course. Besides there is no-one to race against, and eventually you even stop racing yourself or trying to prove anything. People who haved battled addictions will know this feeling. It's like a giving in, but really it's just the less meaningful parts of our persona eroding away, to make way for the real integral person to step forward.

Often after a particularly long run I feel quite humble. I feel more compassionate to others as my own mediocrity has been revealed.I suppose you could say that people who have suffered with drug & alcohol problems are adrenalin junkies, so why not incorporate that into our recovery. It's true that a sense of peace is paramount to succesful recovery, but you can't just kill off parts of your personality. One thing which really seems to plague people in long term recovery is boredom, and this for me is the antidote. I'm sure there are other outdoor sports which pump the adrenalin but also calm you and develop you mentally at the same time. These I would suggest are: rockclimbing, surfing, skiing, horse riding, canoeing etc.. I just picked long distance trail running because its cheap and accessible, and I get bored walking! England is a beautiful country really if you get into it. That's probably not a very fashionable thing to say in this age of backpacking but I could spend my whole life exploring it and still not be done. Besides there's the North and Wales to explore yet but I'll have to get my innoculations done first!

But you don't have to go to the North of England or European mountain ranges to get wilderness or peacefulness. There are many areas in the south like Dartmoor, Exmoor, the Mendips, the North & South Downs, the New Forest, the Chilterns and the North Wessex Downs and many national trails like the Cotswolds Way, the Thames Path, the Ridgeway and the Atlantic Coastal Trail. I intend to run as many of these as I can charting my progress on this blog, detailing routes, info & highlights & where possible pictures. Ultimately I would love to try and link some of these routes up using roads or cycleways to make some mega runs if I can.There's no rush though, the whole ethos here is to develop stamina in life and enjoyment of the outdoors. I'm not really into racing and I suspect obsession with fitness is just vanity.I will blog my slow progress over the Ridgeway and then hopefully other national trails. See what happens.